Thursday, 23 June 2016

More Modest Proposals

Who can vow that he has seen ten people he knows intimately and none had significant behavioural problems.
Swift’s idea in his satirical masterpiece A Modest Proposal which proposed that the poor Irish may consider easing their economic troubles by selling their children as food for rich people was to shock people out of complacency and insensitivity towards issues that they pass by. I think in Kashmir it is impossible to shock people perhaps for the reasons karwan kae dil sae ehsas-i- ziyaan jata raha. Or is it because we have converted life into an object of art? Or we are Nietzschean Zarathustras not vulnerable to pity and sons of the soil of saints who are said to be “beyond good and evil"
Humane Slaughter of New Generation
“Papa, would you please slaughter me?” a five year old child asked.  “Why?” asked the shocked father. “Then I will join God and willn’t have to go the school.”  I heard this dialogue few days back and can assert that something similar can be overheard by most of us from most of students. Therefore I suggest, a slaughter house  that kills humanely, in one go, be built for kids who are subject to such violence in schools that damages them for good and they die mini-deaths almost daily. Or at least these kids be given such a choice to drop out of schools if not from life as well.
Getting Good Students for Religious Schools
Immediately arrest all the parents who send their less gifted children to religious schools for thinking so lowly of God and His religion and criminal neglect of the future of their society. The govt/civil society should ask the madaris management to close their schools immediately on moral grounds as they are thrown the bones while meet is kept for secular education. Isn’t it supremely immoral and against one’s religion and principles of education to admit, in most of cases, the most  unruly and intellectually least gifted or least promising students in madrassahs whose mandate is to provide  teachers or imams – moral-spiritual educators of community besides hukama, theologians and scholars of a host of traditional sciences. Imagine how we would react if we see any public sector or private agency advertising admissions in special schools for the least gifted children and promising to produce the best community leaders/missionaries/legal experts/scholars entrusted with religious-spiritual-moral guidance of new generation. (While it is indeed to be appreciated that some madrassahs do convert straw into gold and there is a small fraction of bright volunteers who choose madrassah education, it is widely perceived that society isn’t, in most cases, ready to send the best students to religious schools and those who admit them seem to be helpless.)
Securing Audit Exemption for Orphanages and Religious Schools
Immediately go for psychiatric examination of those who sow the seeds of distrust and ask for auditing those institutions by professionals and teams from opponent sects which teach trust as a value. They have the temerity to plead that all the educational, social and religious organizations (many private schools are registered as trusts and we know madrassahs are virtually trusts) should be immediately closed or their registration suspended till further orders as most people who give donations have expressed apprehensions regarding their working, especially maintenance of their finances and they might take to streets causing law and order problem. Isn’t it interference in religious affairs  to demand supervision from deviant sects and requiring  publishing of detailed budgetary statements on some public sites/papers or websites with a space for public feedback to seek clarifications or critical appraisal from donors regarding many tiered audit from civil society and trusted accounts professionals. Immediate demand is furnishing of statement.
Treating Cancer of & in Schools
Since people don’t show interest, Babus don’t care, politicians are not willing to experiment with their children in government schools and all kinds of tests have already been discredited and even the Minister, sensing the power of the status quoits lobbies, seems to have second thoughts  on his reform agenda and iconoclastic zeal (the attempt has been to reform the Minister who sought to reform education), it is prudent to close all the govt schools in phased manner (anyway the process has already started from last two years and we have seen schools have been closed at the rate of  more than 5 schools/day) and transfer the money for running schools to local committees who would be operating community schools where public would be directly responsible for educating their children and thus end general mistrust and consequent geebat and protest culture against both private and government schools. Anyway where is education (as distinguished from literacy and mostly irrelevant or useless short term memory based information mugging operations in schools) to justify so much funding and so many teachers? If students don’t seem to learn anything significant about life and its problems and very few if any key skills one needs throughout life why waste their precious years in schools? Why not stop telling lies and plucking a few holes in the boat that has dozens of them and it is only a matter of time that we see it drown? Let it drown with dignity. 
Constructing Mental Hospitals near Schools
Since our school system is the best model in terms of exam and homework stress and the worst space in terms of child abuse (with number of torture devices in place from declining normal sleep to stranding for hours on the way and from schools in buses) we need to declare some of our best private schools as mental asylums or at least prepare a psychiatric ward adjacent to adminstrative block in the schools. This is because most children suffer from certain kind of psychological trouble and because if it is unattended it later expresses in severe pathological forms. Who can vow that he has seen ten people he knows intimately and none had significant behavioural problems – from egoism to sadism to hyper-suspicious and sexist attitudes to tendency to lie (most Kashmiris are expert trithologists(experts in telling lies.), as Prof. Sanullah Parvaz puts it). 
Making Kashmir a Tourist Destination
Ask tourism department to send, annually, 1000 teachers and 5000 students to Finland to experience how without exams (till age 13) and so much of homework, students excel and this model education system has made the country the hub of knowledge tourism and ask them to replicate it here so that educational tourism flourishes here. 
 Refresher Course for Beggars
Conduct beggar training courses to teach them better skills in the course they have discovered to be quite lucrative in terms of employment/job generation. Since the State might hesitate to implement French govt’s policy that eliminated begging overnight by declaring that any person caught begging would be immediately publicly hanged, it is better we make good use of their professional skills. The most likely explanations for tolerating the crime called begging in broad daylight is that they supply hafta to police or social welfare department who know it is a crime but don’t launch FIRs against them or Beggars Organizations contribute to election compaign funding and buy silence of political class. I get suspicious about Hurriyat leadership as it notices smaller crimes compared to begging mafia and has yet to issue a strike call against tarnishing Kashmir’s image through begging. Or seeking azadi isn’t incompatible with tolerating social crime?

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